Hmmmm...some nice one liners....

Hmmm......here are some cute n nice one liners i have come across in recent past....some of them r really witty , others highly illogical ...some have a profound logic trapped in them....well one can flaunt some of them on ur tees n loook cooooooool n funky ..(like Sania Mirza tries to do these dayz) ...so here they goes........

• Say no to drugs they just don't listen.
• A friend in need is a pest indeed.
• Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.
• Work is fine if it doesn't take too much of your time.
• When everything comes in your way you're in the wrong lane.
• The light at the end of the tunnel may be an incoming train.
• Born free taxed to death.
• Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.
• Life is unsure; always eat your dessert first (like i my self practice).
• Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.
• If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you'll have trouble putting on your pants.
• It's not hard to meet expenses, they are everywhere.
• I love being a writer... what I can't stand is the paperwork( thats y i m blogging).
• A printer consists of 3 main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light ( just fits on my printer).
• The hardest part of skating is the ice.
• My phone number is 17. We got one of the early ones.
• The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was the genius.
• The trouble with being punctual is that no one is there to appreciate it.
• In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?
• If you tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe, he'll believe you. But if you tell him a park bench has just been painted, he has to touch it to be sure.
• I had a friend once. Then the rope broke and he got away.
• If you cannot change your mind, are you sure you have one?
• Beat the 5 O'clock rush, leave work at noon!
• If you can't convince them, confuse them.
• It's not the fall that kills you. It's the sudden stop at the end.
• I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder. ( very smart)
• Hot glass looks same as cold glass. - Cunino's Law of Burnt Fingers. ( can any body tell me what that means?? )
• Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups.
• The cigarette does the smoking you are just the sucker.
• Someday is not a day of the week.

Time 2 laugh

Flying lessons

A photographer for a national magazine was assigned to take pictures of a great forest fire. He was advised that a small plane would be waiting to fly him over the fire.
The photographer arrived at the airstrip just an hour before sundown. Sure enough, a small Cessna airplane was waiting. He jumped in with his equipment and shouted, "Let's go!" The tense man sitting in the pilot's seat swung the plane into the wind and soon they were in the air, though flying erratically.
"Fly over the north side of the fire," said the photographer, "and make several low-level passes."
"Why?" asked the nervous pilot.
"Because I'm going to take pictures!" yelled the photographer. "I'm a photographer, and photographers take pictures."
After a long pause, the "pilot" replied: "You mean, you're not my instructor?"

Thought 4 the day!!

Family's silver should be preserved till there is no other
way of paying the butler.

By :: Mani Shankar Aiyar

How creative r u ??????

Hey frds ,
here i have come up with something witty as well creative..........
Just check it and find out how creative r u????
So Zoooooooooooooooooooooooooom isko dekh.............


1. man
-----------
board Ans :::: man overboard

2. stand
----------- Ans :::: i understand
i



ok?....get the drift? Let's try a few now & see how you fare.............



3. /r/e/a/d/i/n/g/

4. r
r o a d
a
d

5. cycle
cycle
cycle

6. t
o
w
n

7. le /
/ vel


8. 0
------------
M.D.
Ph.D.

9. knee
------------
light

10. ii ii
-----------
O O

11. dice
dice

12. t
o
u
c
h

13. ground
---------------
feet
feet
feet
feet
feet
feet

14. he's / himself

15. death / life

16. THINK

and the last one is fun............


17. ababaaabbbbaaaabbbbababaabbaaabbbb....

"To Graduate Is like a Crow "

Hello frds, its me after a long break.....just surfing the net n passing by this short n precise poem abt all of us being "Graduates" ............

To graduate is like a crow Flying up into a tree. Once he gets there he can see All the children down below. To graduate is like a ewe Climbing up a rocky hill. Up and up she goes until She's at the top and sees the view. To graduate is like a frog Hopping up from stair to stair. He doesn't know until he's there How high he is above the bog. Up and up and up we go From grade to grade, from hop to hop. Why do we hop all the way to the top? When we get there, we will know.

Palm Reading

Hmn , well today i got myself indulged in the nitty- gritties of palm reading.
And the results are amazing . I tracked my lines with the help of the astrology provided by Bejan Daruwala and Dr P. K . Sharma....
And, here is the brief account of the story of my hand narrated by the lines of my palm....

Hi Harpreet, you are a pragmatic hand type. Being practical, all your decisions are rational and well thought over. You are extremely self-assured, levelheaded and dynamic. Consistency in approach marks the fulfillment of your ambitions. But this regimen-approach sometimes kills the fun. Your index finger is short. This makes you a dependable team player. A position of command is not for you. But you do have a keen eye for detail. You can be impulsive; not all your moves are quite rational. Look out! Stress could get the better of you. Your index finger being shorter than your ring finger tells us that you are a bit of a dreamer - a sensitive, idealistic dreamer. You mull a lot over minute, subtle detail. The bigger picture cannot be complete for you otherwise. But your personality can do a near-instant makeover to realism if faced with a situation of urgency. You are then a proactive, practical person to the core. Your middle finger being longer than the adjoining fingers in length signifies an even view towards life. You are extremely organised; seldom ever do you 'come apart' in any situation. You seem to have all stages of your life worked out to the last detail, and possess an unbiased and sagacious personality. You evaluate and analyse all your actions towards achieving your goals in life and get there through sheer dedication and will power. The top of your ring finger is in level with the base of the fingernail of your middle finger. You are a sweet talker and can seduce most people and bend them to your will. But this style may have only short-lived results! Your little finger is set evenly at the base with the middle finger. The scrupulousness in your personality is your finest asset. It leads you to take rational decisions. Your little finger reaches above the first flexure line (joint) of your ring finger. You have the gift of the gab and can talk endlessly - all you need is a listening partner. you are a pragmatic hand type. Being practical, all your decisions are rational and well thought over. You are extremely self-assured, levelheaded and dynamic. Consistency in approach marks the fulfillment of your ambitions. But this regimen-approach sometimes kills the fun. You have a moderately long lifeline; the period between 50 and 60 years is an unpredictable phase in your life. Exercise extra care during that phase. You attach a lot of importance to customs and rituals. You prefer constancy and stability to change. You are deeply attached to your home. Your headline is frayed at its origin. You come across as a secretive person. Your unhappy childhood seems to reflect in all your relationships. Your headline ends in a fork. You contemplate deeply before executing plans. This trait is usually inherent in lawyers and authors. Your headline is medium straight. You are a highly rational individual. You are thought oriented and never act before thinking it through. You are a completely transparent person. You have no inhibitions in sharing your innermost feelings with others. You are mature and non-judgemental, accepting people just as they are. A fast-paced life is not or you. Your fate line is centered. This indicates that you are a perceptive individual. You tread carefully in life owing to past negative experiences.

So this is what i got to know abt myself through the palm reading site.....n believe me a lot of things above matches with what i think abt myself .....
So if anybody else also wish to learn what his/her hand has in store for himself , he/she can follow the link palm......

"WORDS GET YOU INTO DEEP TROUBLE IF YOU DON"T

Here is a small , compact and free of cost advice from my side.........

Terok Singh was travelling in a crowded bus. He was carrying the passport size photograph of his son (for college admission).Accidently,the photographfell down from his pocket.He started searching for it frantically & found it on the floor, below the ends of a woman's saree.He asked her "Can you lift that saree? I wanna take photograph"The rest is history. He was beaten so badly that he had to be admitted to hospital. He was surprised to see Butol Singh on the bed next to him,in a worse condition. Butol explained what happened to him.He had gone to a remote village to work. He finished late and missed thelast bus. He couldn't find any hotel.So he approached a nearby house and asked the Owner whether he can staythere for the night. The Owner replied "I have 2 grownup daughters.? Sorry,Ican't allow you to stay".He approached the next house and asked whether he can stay there for thenight.The Owner replied,"I have 3 grown up daughters.? Sorry, I can't allowyou to stay".He went to the next house and asked:" Do you have "grown up daughters?".?The Owner asked,"WHY?????????"Butol replied, " I wanted to stay here for a night....."The rest is history.

THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS "WORDS GET YOU INTO DEEP TROUBLE IF YOU DON"T USE THEM CORRECTLY." So better beware next time u ask someone "Do u have grown up daughters? " ha ha ha...............